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Happy 1st Birthday in Heaven

May 19, 2014 By katbiggie 16 Comments

cate2

Dear Cate –

Today is your first birthday. I hope you are having a wonderful party in heaven.

I never got to meet you or see you but I love you anyway. Just a little more than a year after my own “Kate” (as Grandpa calls her) went to heaven, you joined her.

Your mother is so special to me. I have tried to be there for her in any way that I could over the last year. She is so strong. She keeps herself together and keeps on smiling, never letting her other sweet children see the pain I know she is feeling. She is beautiful, she is kind, she is loved.

She is the reason I began the journey of Sunshine after the Storm: A Survival Guide for the Grieving Mother. When I learned of your birth, sleeping, I wanted to try to capture everything I could to help her survive this pain. It is not a perfect product, but it is full of love, hope, and encouragement. And it is dedicated to you.

Sweet “pure” Cate. You are so loved, by so many people. And we miss you.

My heart is filled by images of our two baby girls, Kathryn and Catherine, playing together somewhere beautiful and nice.

I hope you received our birthday gift!

with love,

Alexa

cate

 

 

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katbiggie

Freelance writer at Kat Biggie Press
Alexa B, who blogs as "Kat Biggie" is a wife, mother, and writer. She has three children and one in heaven. She recently self published a book entitled "Sunshine After the Storm: A Survival Guide for the Grieving Mother" which is available on Amazon. She blogs about life after the loss of one of her twin daughters to TTTS, motherhood, all things parenting, advocacy, grief support and social good.

Latest posts by katbiggie (see all)

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Filed Under: infant loss Tagged With: Grief Loss and Bereavement, Grieving Mother, Mental Health, Stillbirth

Comments

  1. another jennifer says

    May 19, 2014 at 4:58 pm

    What a beautiful and bittersweet letter. My heart goes out to little Cate and her family today. I have no doubt she and Kathryn are with you all today. xo
    another jennifer recently posted…Philanthropy Friday: Track Your Giving FootprintMy Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:43 pm

      Thank you Jen. Yesterday wasn’t about me, but it still hit me really hard. I’m glad we were able to celebrate in an uplifting way.

      Reply
  2. Janine Huldie says

    May 19, 2014 at 7:15 pm

    Aww, Alexa, this was absolutely beautiful and I was crying reading it. I also have no doubt the two girls are playing together and best of friends up in heaven. Thanks for sharing here today, Alexa. Hugs xoxo.
    Janine Huldie recently posted…Here Comes The SunMy Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:43 pm

      I didn’t include this in my letter, but they are buried just a few feet away from each other… so both our families will be together for eternity. So yes, I’m sure they are besties.

      Reply
  3. Lisa @ The Golden Spoons says

    May 19, 2014 at 10:09 pm

    Oh, me heart! So sweet and so sad. I’m certain they are having a beautiful party, indeed. Hugs to you!
    Lisa @ The Golden Spoons recently posted…She Had Me At “Cookie!”My Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:42 pm

      The best party ever! At least I hope that’s what happens!

      Reply
  4. Katie @ Pick Any Two says

    May 20, 2014 at 8:48 am

    So beautiful, Alexa. My heart aches for Cate’s mom today, but also rejoices in the image of the two little girls dancing around with pure joy!
    Katie @ Pick Any Two recently posted…The 6 Christmas Gifts My Toddler is Still Obsessed WithMy Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:42 pm

      It’s hard to be sad when you’re surrounded by so much love. Cate’s parents had no idea we were all going to be at the park to do this balloon release for them. It was a happy moment in a sad situation.

      Reply
  5. thedoseofreality says

    May 20, 2014 at 9:47 am

    Hugs to you and your sweet friend. This is just beautiful in every way.-Ashley
    thedoseofreality recently posted…Would You Rather: Watch Grease Or Grease 2?My Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:41 pm

      Isn’t it? My favorite part is that I caught her parents smiling as they released the balloons.

      Reply
  6. Dana says

    May 20, 2014 at 12:40 pm

    Two beautiful girls playing together – what a lovely image. Thinking of Cate’s parents, and you, Alexa. And thank you for including the photo; it made me smile through the tears.
    Dana recently posted…What’s on your summer reading list?My Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 20, 2014 at 1:40 pm

      Thank you Dana. The best part was, Cate’s parents had no idea we were doing this for them. My sneaky friends arranged it all. It was beautiful!

      Reply
  7. Chris Carter says

    May 21, 2014 at 11:19 am

    Oh my heart! I am so deeply touched by your precious letter… and how you celebrated her birthday in Heaven.

    *tears*
    Chris Carter recently posted…I Welcome Yvonne, Proud Author of Drawings in SandMy Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 21, 2014 at 1:41 pm

      It brought a bit of serenity and happiness to a sad occasion. Thank you Chris.

      Reply
  8. The Dose of Reality says

    May 21, 2014 at 12:39 pm

    I’m typing through tears, Alexa. It’s hard for me to even express how touched I was by this post. It’s just completely beautiful. –Lisa
    The Dose of Reality recently posted…Old Granny Is Still DirtyMy Profile

    Reply
    • katbiggie says

      May 21, 2014 at 1:40 pm

      Thank you Lisa.

      Reply

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