Rest in peace Robin Williams. I truly mean that. I hope you have finally found the quiet you desperately needed. I pray that your desperate action will help and save countless others.
I couldn’t sleep last night.
My mind just could not stop thinking about that moment in “Dead Poet’s Society” when the boys climb on their desk in support of their teacher, who was played by Robin Williams. “Oh Captain, my Captain” they stated. It was a scene forever burned in my brain. The moment when people decide to stand up for someone else, even though it may come with personal consequences.
When I learned last night of Robin Williams’ suicide, all I could think about was all the good and greatness he has brought into our world. The hours of entertainment he has provided me, from the time I was a small child watching “Mork and Mindy” with my family to his most recent role in the TV show “The Crazy Ones” and so many memorable movies and TV shows in between.
I was heartbroken. I am heartbroken.
Some people call suicide an act of cowardliness. We wonder how they could possibly do this to their family and friends. We call them selfish.
Yet few of us truly understand the depth of pain and despair that someone feels when the only option they can find for peace and stillness in their lives is to take away their own life.
When, to that person, the only option to quell the pain, is death.
Upon hearing the news, I immediately thought of my friend Nathalie. Her mother committed suicide a few years ago, and I knew this news would likely have a big impact on her. She wrote about this event today on her blog in a post called Depression and Suicide. The part that really resonated was a quote from her mother.
“I just wanted to end this pain, it had nothing to do with you or anyone else” – my mother’s words when we were talking about her previous attempts.
“I know grief would be hard at the beginning but it will get easier with time,” she added… I shook my head in disbelief. She must be out of her mind.
And that’s the crux of it.
For some people, their pain is so tremendous. It’s even more shocking when it happens to someone who is so full of “funny” and brings so much happiness to others.
Celebrities and important people die all the time. But I’m REALLY broken up about this one.
Depression is scary… I can’t think of another actor who has been in my life since my earliest memories. Who has made me laugh hysterically, sob like I would never recover, and think about the deepest of topics. And the fact that someone made us laugh so hard was fighting such a terrible inner disease.
It worries me tremendously that someone with so much affluence and reason to live and access to health care and medication could still not escape the inner darkness.
What does that mean for those suffering from #depression that do not have those resources?
If you are reading this and you have found yourself unbearably sad, depressed, and hurting, please PLEASE reach out to a crisis center, friend, doctor, anyone. PLEASE let someone help you.
RIP Robin Williams.
May your death be a wake up call to the #mentalhealth crisis in our country. And you will be terribly missed.