It’s not International Bereaved Mother’s Day today, but some days it feels like every day should be. Once bitten by pregnancy or infant loss, always plagued. I had intended on spending today going over my notes from Bloggy Bootcamp and writing a stellar post about all the amazing things I learned and how much better […]
TTTS Tuesday: Heatherly Rose and Winter Lille
I met Taylor in the TTTS Grief Support group. It was shortly after she lost her girls and she was devastated. Today we honor her girls by sharing their story. Taylor’s experience shows how suddenly TTTS can occur and further emphasizes why earlier and more frequent ultrasounds are so important in multiples pregnancies. Heatherly […]
A Little History About No Holding Back
I used to use Blogger, which is where I started my blog at www.noholdingback1212.com. That was a great platform to start on but I am ready to move on to bigger things! I’m so happy you have followed me over! This is one of my very first posts where I told the world who I […]
Premonition or Self Fulfilling Prophecy?
Or maybe just straight up coincidence? Perhaps. But I’m not sure I really believe that much in coincidence any more. Although I don’t understand why certain things happen at the time, it seems that later, when I look back, I can see exactly how things came to be. I’m getting ahead of myself! A few […]
Surviving the Winds of Change
Do we ever get over infant loss? Big green eyes look at me curiously as I stare off into space, daydreaming of the little girl I see in my dreams. Her long brown hair blows in the wind as she romps around a field of daisies, waving at me and smiling! “Hi Mommy!” she calls […]
TTTS Tuesday – Catherine and Hattie’s Story
I have been so inspired by the mothers who have lost and yet give back so much. This week is no different. Emily really made an impression on me because rather than letting her grief from losing her identical twin daughters completely consume her, she began a photo project in their honor. I know so […]
Will I Ever Be Content?
I have been struggling a lot this last week. I don’t know why. Nothing in particular has triggered it, that I can think of beyond the fact that I miss my baby girl so, so much. I have so very much to be thankful for, yet I am not content. I want FOUR children. […]
Oh Christmas Bush
The worst day of my life was December 21, 2011. One year ago today was my infant daughter Kathryn’s funeral. I dreaded the moment in which we all acknowledged that she was gone forever. All of my husband’s family had arrived the night before. And even though I was happy they were there, I did […]
Always With You
Who doesn’t love a good quote from Winnie the Pooh? “If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with […]
While Others Stand Still (TTTS Tuesday – Andrea)
Grief is a funny thing. Not ha ha funny, obviously, but in the way it impacts us. My loyal readers know that I am no stranger to grief, having lost my own daughter one year ago on the 12th. So when this absolutely mindblowing and incomprehensible act happened on the 14th, I was already in […]
Words To Say When A Baby Dies
If you’re here, you’re probably struggling for the right words to say when a baby dies… My first exposure to “baby loss” occurred in April 2005. Friends of mine, Anja and Corey, were expecting their first baby. She was a week overdue, and noticed she felt no movement. They went into the hospital on a Friday […]
6 Months Ago Today…
At 8:53pm tonight, it will be exactly six months since I held my beautiful Kathryn as she took her last breaths and returned to God. There’s not one second of any day that I don’t think about her and miss her, that I don’t feel cheated out of something, that I don’t wish that I […]
